Sassy Pants here today working with Ms. Molly. I have been down over the hill in the oak grove routing around for tasty morsals. Squirrels are wonderful little critters. They hide their nuts and then forget where they put them. After a long time those nuts start to sprout--oh, they are good! But routing doesn't take a whole lot of your brain, you know, so you can think about things. Digging in the roots I remembered a story I shared with Molly and she thought I should tell the story in case it helps.
A brother and sister were outside playing; they had turned on the water faucet and were playing with the hose. Mom sent the older brother out to turn the water off because Dad said not to play in the water. Little brother and sister paid no attention and kept right on playing in the water. Older brother turned off the water before they all got in trouble. At the very moment he had his hand on the faucet Dad came around the corner. Older brother was in trouble. He loudly declared, "I was shutting it off! they turned it on and I was shutting it off because you said we should not play in the water."
Dad did not listen. He punished older brother. Later Mom told Dad that Older Brother was innocent. All Dad said was, "Guess the joke's on me!" There never was an apology. Dad never admitted that he was wrong. Young brother and sister were never punished. It was not fair and Older Brother was angry...angry at Dad for punishing him when it was not his fault and for not listening, and then for not apologizing, and then forlaughing and thinking it was funny! But it wasn't funny and it wasn't safe to be angry with Dad!
What do you do? You try to forget about it. Days and years go by and it becomes buried like those roots I was digging in, and twisted and entangled with other memories and feelings. After a while the brain has a difficult task figuring out which root goes with what memory. Everyone sort of forgot about what happened and the years went by. Years later Older Brother began to have a real problem with anger. He would blow up like a volcano and no one knew what would cause him to blow. Even he could see that he was much more angry than he should have been when his kid left her bike in the wrong place. He could see it wasn't right to be hugely angry over a little thing.
He began to dig. Like me looking for buried acorns, he had to dig through a lot of other stuff that had nothing to do with it before he found that acorn of anger at his dad. When he forgave his dad (even though his dad never apologized) then all he had was a bad habit. Forgiving Dad in his heart took the steam out of his anger. Now all he had was a habit of yelling when he was angry. He could break a habit! At first he could feel himself becoming angry but he could not stop--he still yelled. Then he would become angry but he could stop before he yelled. Then he would feel the anger rise and go back down. Finally he got so he didn't even become angry; he could talk about a problem when it was happening and sort it out! But as long as that anger was buried inside with no apology and no forgiveness he could not control his anger.
Ms. Molly thought I should say that if any of you get hugely angry about things that just need a little anger she could listen if you want to try to figure out which twisty root is connected. But mostly, kids, just work at solving the problem right then and there! If the problem is big enough maybe get an adult to help you sort things out. So if you have questions...just ask Molly!
Sassy Pants, signing off here!
Monday, June 18, 2012
Saturday, June 16, 2012
Now then, our barnyard lessons are back in full swing! The new little ones are learning the lessons of the barnyard. Some lessons take a few tries before they are learned. Here is a story that I overheard as I walked by the pig pen.
Piggy #1 had a big knot on his head and came squealing to his big sister for comfort.
Big Sister: "What happened?"
#1: "I was routing for acorns and fell into the creek. I hit my head on a rock!"
Big Sister: "What were you thinking?"
#1: "Thinking? I was trying to get acorns!"
Big Sister: "Ooooh, you were not thinking! You know choices have consequences; Miss Molly told you the story! If you choose to lean too far over the edge of the bank, you will always have consequences--you will fall on your head! Well, it is not bleeding. Better go soak in the cool mud! And next time, think before you do that!"
I could not help but chuckle. Now I think this next Sassy Pants story is about "Some learn the easy way and some learn the hard way!" I suspect that Leo Lamb and his daddy are having some differences of opinion! I have noticed that Leo has a serious case of the wiggles. I suspect that he is one of those children who need to have a way to use up some extra energy. How much of those wiggles are from his energy level and how much is because of some problem at home--well, I just don't know. There is nothing wrong with such a child. Some bodies have these extra loads of energy; those children need to have a way of learning that will burn up some of that energy at the same time they are learning. Their bodies are just different than many other folks' bodies. I am going to poke around to find a way he can be busy, yet not distracting others, while he listens to our stories.
Have any of you children who read this have a story to tell about the lessons from the Sassy Pants stories? How did you learn your lesson? Drop us a note right below in the comment box and I will read it and we will see how we can help each other learn!
Meet you at the gate!